Brandon D (beeminefl) wrote in freetherapy,
Brandon D


XXXXXXX [4:55 PM]: you must be that person i asked for

This is tremendously heartwarming, and terrifying at the same time. Power corrupts. To be people's guru/angel/sensei is something I've always wanted to be, but as I grow older, the dangers of bad advice, or advice taken out of context, or giving advice without properly knowing the situation become apparent.

I once gave advice to a 'happily' (or so I thought) married man saying... yeah ok your looking at gay porn isn't horrible, as long as you don't 'need' it to achieve orgasm and as long as you don't act on it in the real world... well now he's in jail for lewd battery on a minor...

herein we see how easily you have to wonder was I brash and too quick to judge what I was hearing? Was I cocky and overconfident and lacking in the true love/care to give the RIGHT advice and ask the RIGHT questions to have found the information I needed to say NO this is WRONG. Did the gay porn cause the act? I really doubt it, as many of my friends engage in porn all the time and they aren't in jail for such things.

This issue has been such a huge complex and confusing issue for my belief that my advice could not be dangerous. But you know you give someone the right advice and it doesn't matter how good it is, if they recieve via previously damaged colored lenses of their experience they can percieve in many horrible ways and take the good advice to mean they should do something bad.

e.g. - a psychopath who was beaten nearly to death over many years while being told it's because I love you and it's for your own good... if you tell him you should try to 'love' everyone... well did YOU just create a serial killer? somehow I think a very well trained psychologist would be able to avoid this caveat, which I am not, once again leading me back to my poor qualifications for giving those with deeper issues good advice.

Maybe the diminished contact after our little discussion of his porn habits should have been a big clue that that was merely the surface of the problem.
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